柱钢筋接头错开距离:提交大学的作文要能体现自己的特质

    儿子申请了美国最好的10所大学，每个大学要求的写作内容和文章数量不尽相同，下面选出的四篇文章都是发给最终录取他的学校的，其中《用耳朵阅读》和《和平之旅》则发给了10所学校的每一所。

    《用耳朵阅读》从一个侧面反映了儿子日常生活的常态，但这一“常态”又非常与众不同。大部分人阅读是通过“眼睛”，所以“用耳朵阅读”单是题目就有让人耳目一新的感觉，读过之后，招生人员通过该文进一步了解到儿子英语水平、文学修养、处事方式等诸多信息，可谓一举多得，算得上是一篇成功的申请文章；《和平之旅》则通过对一次特别活动的生动描写，展示了儿子驾驭语言和与人沟通的能力，又从另一个侧面展示了儿子的特质。

    有关电影拍摄的短文和根据校友箴言进行的拓展写作则分别是应“达特茅斯”和“阿默斯特文理学院”要求而特别撰写的，前者把简历中陈述的、自己引以为傲的活动做了更加详尽的说明，后者则以自己的视角向申请学校展示了对某一客观存在所持看法。

    短文是除了一到两篇主要的Essay之外，有些学校比如达特茅斯额外要求申请人撰写的描述自己某项兴趣爱好的文章，旨在发现申请人某一个专门方面兴趣、品质和能力。这里可以选择的范围就很大了，大可不必绞尽脑汁去想一个与众不同的题目；无论孩子喜爱什么、专注什么，只要是孩子自己认为最重要、对他影响最大的活动或者爱好，那就是最好的话题。值得注意的是，这种文章一般有很严格的字数限制（150-200字左右），因此对孩子驾驭文字的能力是一个考验。毕竟，用越少的话把一件事情阐述清楚就越加困难。儿子当时虽然爱好广泛，但最后还是选择了最令自己难忘的英语剧活动。

    除了在共同的网络申请平台上所要求的几篇文章之外，有些学校往往还会要求申请人专门为该校单独写一篇文章，以此甄别该申请人是否符合学校的口味。下面所列的作文4就是儿子给阿默斯特文理学院撰写的文章，题目是根据一句校友名言阐述自己的观点。

    原文及译文一一列出，谨供读者参考。

 作文１

Reading with Ears

用耳朵阅读

I am the kind of person who uses the same pair of shoes for jogging，soccer and basketball，but when it comes to updating my MP3 player，I am always as meticulous as my savings allow me to be. The reason is simple: I keep my MP3 memory filled to the brim— with audio books in English.

我是那种无论打篮球、慢跑、还是踢足球都永远只有一双鞋穿的人，但如果是用来给我的MP3升级换代，那本人对于钱包的管制就要宽松得多。原因也很简单：我的MP3当中永远塞满了英文有声书。

I began learning English at the early age of three; as I grew older，I started reading in both English and Chinese，establishing a lasting friendship with the written word. I would spend days reading inside the house，going out to play only when ordered to by my parents. So imagine my bitterness when school and homework deprived me of ever increasing periods of free time，allowing the bookshelf to gather a thin layer of dust as days went by.

早在三岁的时候，我就接触到了英文，随着年龄的增长，我逐渐尝试着涉猎中文和英文两种语言的书籍，而开始与文字结缘。一连几天，我都可以把自己锁在家里与书为伴，只有被爸妈逼着才会出门玩耍。可想而知，当学校和作业把我越来越多的时间据为己有、让我久违的书架沾染灰尘之时，我心中的悲恸该有多么深厚。

Salvation presented itself in the form of a present. During my fourth year in grade school，my aunt returned from the US，bringing with her a seven-cassette audio book，Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets，narrated by Jim Dale. I received the present with trembling hands，feeling just as Harry would have felt when he found himself on the threshold of an entire new world filled with golden possibilities.

一个突如其来的礼物救赎了我嗷嗷待哺的心灵。小学四年级时，我的舅妈从美国返乡，还特地给我带了一套七盘磁带装的有声书：《哈利波特与密室》，由Jim Dale朗读。我用一双颤抖的手接过礼物，突然感觉自己和哈利一样，正在一个崭新世界的当口面对无数精彩的可能性而叹为观止。

Audio books，the perfect，almost obvious solution; even if my eyes had been taken hostage by the sad excuse of a grade school education，my ears could still roam free above all the relentless humdrum of daily obligations.　

有声书，对“悲惨”的小学生活来说简直是最完美、近乎显而易见的出路。哪怕我的双眼被课本和纸笔所蒙塞，我的双耳依旧可以在每日兢兢业业的苦力活之外自由翱翔。

Audio books，unlike printed ones，can be attended to almost anywhere，anytime. Bumpy rides and clamoring restaurants used to be my worst nightmare，but as soon as I grabbed a headphone set，the world became my very own desk.

有声书和印刷书籍不同，可以在几乎任何时间、地点给“读者”带来愉悦。颠簸的车程和喧闹的餐厅曾几何时是我这书虫的天敌，而如今只要一对耳机挂在耳畔，那整个世界就顿时成了我的私人书桌。

Consequently every place I have been and every step I have taken has acquired its unique significance through a piece of literature. I went to school with J.D Salinger，watching Holden Caulfield play the catcher in the rye; I came back home to Fitzgerald，joining Gatsby in his party at night; I sat in Pizza Hut with the Corleone gang，listening to Vito reason with his sons; I stood on the subway with Forrest Gump，babbling away about the wonders of late. This is where Jane first met Rochester; this is where Elizabeth rejected Darcy's offer; this is where Heathcliff started his revenge anew; this is where David Copperfield hit Uriah. The mundane locations of my daily routines had been transformed into windows through which I could glance upon a thousand worlds.

拜有声书所赐，我的每一个去处每一段路，都被某篇文学作品涂上了浓墨重彩。我和塞林格（《麦田守望者》的作者）并肩上学，睥睨霍尔顿考菲尔德（《麦田守望者》的主人公）守望在悬崖之上。我和菲茨杰罗德（美国二十世纪最杰出的作家之一）一同归家，在夜色掩护下潜入盖茨比的派对（Fitzgerald笔下《了不起的盖茨比》的男主人公）。我与（《教父》中的角色）考利昂家族同坐披萨店餐桌，听Vito在诸子前循循善诱。我和 Forrest Gump一起搭乘地铁，信口开河回顾已往之奇观……这边是 Jane与 Rochester初遇之所，这厢，Elizabeth刚刚回绝Darcy的追求，这里是Heathcliff复仇伊始，那里是 David Copperfield痛打 Uriah的大快人心……我日复一日的百无聊赖被打开了一扇窗，透过它，大千世界之曼妙风采尽收眼底。

Naturally，audio books involve only the narrator and myself，yet the long hours spent in solitude never alienated me from other people or the outside world. A good speaker may attract any number of audiences，but as it turns out，a good listener can keep any number of friends. Fortunately，years of experience have made me a master at the art of listening. People trust me with their thoughts because when they talk，I really listen，instead of what most people do everyday: wait for their turn to speak.

尽管有声书是我和朗诵者之间区区两人的交流，但长时间的独处并没有让我与世隔绝。一个能说会道的人也许能吸来诸多听众，但懂得倾听之士才容易结交朋友。深得此幸，多年的经验让我在聆听他人之道上早已轻车熟路；许多朋友喜欢把心事对我说，因为他们明白自己说出来的话我会用心倾听，而不是像如今大多数人一般：等待自己开口的时机。

Over the past decade，audio books have proved far more than a means to an end，or a hobby for spare time. In fact，they have become my way of life. As duties urge me to keep up in this raging world and the ever more demanding tasks it offers， I have created for myself a safe haven of knowledge and inspiration. Surrounded by whispers of wisdom，I walk through school，work and play，through life.

在过去的十年里，有声书之于我早已不再是敲门砖之功用，也不仅仅停留在闲暇娱乐的层面—它已然成为了一种生活方式。在这个车水马龙的世界里，总有做不完的事和负不尽的责督促我大步向前，但有声书为我搭建了一个知识和灵感源源不断的桃花仙境。智慧的低语在身边萦绕，陪伴着我学习、工作、玩乐，陪伴着我享受人生。

作文２

Peace Camp Journal

和平之旅

“This is like… having a life…” I murmured in awe.

“这…才叫生活啊……” 我一脸敬仰道。

Unfortunately, Carolyn heard, and laughed out loud that hysterical laugh so peculiar of her. She declared it the best line from me so far, and that I must come to meet the others. An iron grip then closed around my wrist, dragging me across the deck through a matrix of snow-white decliners. Some 40 yards off, the pool could be seen glistening in the Egyptian sun.

很不幸，耳尖的卡罗琳没有错过我的喃喃自语，并不失时机爆发出一阵歇斯底里的招牌式的大笑。她表示打我们见面以来，这是听我说过的最逗的一句话，然后让我赶快去见过其他人。铁一般的一握攀上我手腕，于是我被拖泥带水地牵过一片雪白沙滩躺椅。40码外，游泳池在埃及的艳阳下金光四溢。

Yes, Egypt.

没错，埃及。

To fully grasp the meaning of this situation, we need to go some 50 years back, when U.S president Dwight Eisenhower founded People to People International, a non-profit humanitarian organization dedicated to world peace. Each year since established, PTPI invites a select group of young people from nations all over the world to its renowned annual event in Cairo, Egypt: the PTPI Peace Camp.  Naturally, representing one’s country is not a job for the average soccer-playing movie-going 17-year-old, but for a soccer-playing movie-going 17-year-old with unique qualities. I believed I was the one. Apparently those bulky officials from Ministry of Foreign Affairs had agreed.

如果想要搞清楚这到底怎么回事，我们恐怕得回溯到五十年前，时任美国总统德怀特?艾森豪威尔创立People To People International，一个非营利国际和平组织之际。自成立伊始，PTPI每年都会从世界各地挑选出一批年轻人，参加其颇负盛名的埃及和平营。诚然，一个只晓得踢足球的17岁男孩离“代表”中国的同龄人也许还有差距；但一个既喜爱踢球，又拥有一些独特意志品质的17岁男孩或许能够胜任。我自忖符合后者的条件，而最后外交部那几位魁梧的审查官员似乎也表示了同意。

To some extent, I was surprised that at the moment Carolyn, an American, had not begun questioning me about human rights, Tibet, or Taiwan. Before leaving for the camp, months were spent in front of the computer screen gathering information. I had expected heated debates over political standing, calculated assaults between historical rivals, but I had not expected a five-star Nile Adventurer waiting at the dock, or daily visits to ancient ruins, or exotic cuisine served at each meal, or a top deck with armchairs and a top-class swimming pool. On board were 50 people from 25 countries, and everyone just enjoyed the culture gulf, Model United Nations be damned. 

回到现在，我不由想起卡罗琳，作为一个美国人，竟然到现在为止都还没有提起任何一点关于中国的敏感话题。启程之前，我花了个把月功夫正襟危坐在电脑屏幕前收集资料。一心想着到时候少不了各自为了政治立场唇枪舌剑，亦少不了宿敌暗流涌动。可我的准备白费了：谁也想不到，一艘五星级“尼罗河探险者”号游轮会在码头静候我们驾到，想不到每日一处的古迹废墟观光，想不到船上每日三餐异域风情美食，想不到顶层甲板一望无垠的沙滩椅和华丽的泳池。船上拥载了来自25个不同国家的50名年轻人，可是大家都在享受着彼此之间的文化差异。让模拟联合国什么的都见鬼去吧！

I felt like Alice tumbling down the rabbit hole, only to realize after waking up: pretty nice hole.

我感觉自己仿佛爱丽丝掉入了兔穴，苏醒过来后环视一周，不由喃喃道：感觉挺不错嘛。

Even so, the first two days we arrived in Egypt, and before boarding the ship, I had remained as taciturn as a wall. Not out of annoyance to anyone or anything, both the people and the activities had far exceeded my irrational hopes. It was the principle of this Peace Camp that caught me off guard. Peace through understanding, it meant instead of convincing people, one should try to be convinced, to open his or her mind to either side of the story, which also meant most of my preparations went straight into the Nile. However, failure to adapt had never entered my options, and while views and notions may be provincial, humor is always universal. This I discovered first night on the Nile Adventurer.

即便如此，在到埃及最初的两天、还没登上游艇的时候，我总是木讷地像堵墙一般。倒不是因为有什么人或事让我不得开心颜，实话说这几天的日程安排和所见之各路人才都已经让我惊喜莫名。说到底，是这次和平营的主旨让我一时难以接受：和平源自理解。这意味着，大家在这里的目的与其是要说服别人，不如说是要信服于人，是敞开心扉、接受任何事物的两面性。这意味着我之前专门做的刻苦准备可以扔进尼罗河里去了，着实令人一时不知所措。然而，“格格不入”这种概念压根就没进过我脑子。即使和平营的众人并非我所预期，但风趣和幽默永远是与人相处的上佳选择。在尼罗河上的第一夜，我就明白了这点。

 “…9 o’clock pm. So there I was, alone in the room, fresh off the plane with every inch of me screaming for sleep. Then I wondered what if a burly roommate returned in the middle of the night and beat me up for not paying the proper respect…”

“……晚上九点钟，刚下了飞机，我一个人呆在屋子里，累得恨不得倒头就睡。但我突然想到：万一跟我同宿的哥儿们是个彪形大汉，半夜回来发现我毫无礼貌，连个招呼都没打就睡觉，恼火之余把我一顿痛扁怎么办？”

Chuckles broke out. Apparently on the first night, more than a few people had had to deal with the same trepidation.

台下众人发出阵阵“嗤嗤”的笑声。似乎大家初来乍到，和我有类似感触的人也不在少数。

“…I could see trunks and bags scattered around one of the beds, but I could’t exactly go over his clothes and feel the sizes could I?” more laughs “and then it hit me— you have to understand I was hanging by a thread at the moment—I went over to his bedside, placed my shoe beside one of his sneakers, and behold: I had the bigger foot! I was taller! I was safe!”

“……我看到一张床的周围散落着行李箱和包裹，但是我又不能翻人家的衣物来判断他的身材你说是不是？（更多笑声）”，“这时我灵光一现—大家理解一下啊，我当时都已经‘走投无路’了—然后我走到他床边，用脚比了比陌生室友的鞋：惊喜！他得脚没有我的大！我比他个儿高！我安全了！”

 Roars of laughter exploded all around the common room; people clutched their cheeks and held on to nearby sofas for support.

休息室里爆发出一阵大笑，大家捂着腮帮子，纷纷笑倒在沙发上。

 “…that aside, people, I must say Peace Camp is one of best things that ever happened to me. Before we met, I bore the stereotype of my countryman like a cross over my shoulders, but in your company I finally threw off those burdens to become myself, once and for all. It is a magical process I suggest all of you experience. You can remain in your comfort zone of course, safe with your own feelings and preying for the clock to speed up, or you can step out of that prison and embrace this chance of a lifetime. Before our camp, peace was to me like the Pyramid of Egypt, a concept to often mentioned, but rarely seen. Here, I am fortunate enough to have witnessed both.”

“……话说回来，同学们，我想说这次和平营真的是迄今砸得我最狠的一块馅儿饼。在见到你们之前，我一直思前想后为如何代表、宣扬我们国家的光辉荣耀儿焦虑不已；但是现如今，在你们的陪伴下，我终于能一扫这荒唐的桎梏而做回我自己。个中滋味，难描难绘；只求诸君亦能品尝。自然，画地为牢、度日如年也不失为一种选择，但如果你走出来，离开自己熟悉、依赖的环境，而拥抱这和平营中与我们相伴的种种，那你也许会收获一次毕生难忘的经历。在这次活动之前，“和平”这种概念之于我便仿佛埃及的金字高塔：常有耳闻而素昧平生。而在这里，我有幸把这两个陌生的奇观一起尽收眼底。”

First, there was silence. Then thunderous applause erupted from every corner of the room; cheers and yells shot up like fireworks. Grinning, I walked down stage and handed the microphone over to our leader, Barbara Capozzi, who asked me two times without realizing, whether I had prepared for this speech. I replied negative, and she responded with a bear hug, breaking all my ribs and promising me that this “open Mike session” would from now on become a tradition of the Peace Camp.

起初，屋子里一片沉默，随即雷鸣般的掌声从房间的各个角落轰鸣而来；欢呼和尖叫更是一浪高过一浪。我满脸笑容地走下讲台，把话筒递给领队芭芭拉?卡波兹。她激动地连问两次“这稿子是事先准备好的？”。我告诉她不是，她便一个熊抱夹碎了我周身骨骼，然后对我保证这种“即兴插电相声”从此将成为和平营的传统。

As I walked back to my seat, people looked at me with expressions Columbus would have held when he saw continents looming over the horizon: big smiles tinged with surprise. I knew all was not perfect; there were sessions ahead that promised dissent, the inevitable parting doomed for tears, but for now I lay back, relaxed, preparing once again. This time, for the most glorious week in my life.

在我返回自己座位时，（图51埃及和平之旅）周围的人都用一种哥伦布发现新大陆的目光注视着我：满面笑容，惊喜交加。我知道前面的路不见得会皆大欢喜，总会有分组讨论里出现预见的分歧，而人有悲欢离合，是泪水也无法改变的事实。不过现在，我终于又能够放松筋骨，仰面朝天，迎接我人生中最美好的一周。

作文3

Short story

短文

During senior 2, I wrote, directed and shot an English film. It surprises me now how much work and effort can be put into one simple sentence, but there it was. When a good film is focused on everyday life, it always tells a story or leaves a message that everyone understands perfectly, but can never aptly express for himself. However, before my own movie, I had taken all these incredible virtues too much for granted. As soon as I had started, I realized how na?ve I had been, thinking it only took an original script, the right actors, and undying enthusiasm to make a good movie. What I came to learn later was the combination of these essential elements, and the art of communicating with people on my cast and crew. The movie carried a spark of my inspiration, as well as a stage of my life.

    高二那年，我自己编剧、导演、拍摄了一部英语影片。一开始，我根本没有想过写一句台词能让人如此纠结，可惜事实证明，果真如此。一部好电影，如果所选题材为平平淡淡的家里寻常，那它一定要做到化腐朽为神奇，说出观众们天天经历却难以表达的心里话。然而在我真正开始写剧本、导演电影之前，(图52美丽新班级剧照)我把这些好电影的方方面面都视为理所当然。曾一直以为只要有一个原创剧本、合适的演员和执着的热情就可以拍出一部好电影，但当自己真正开始做这些的时候，才发现之前的想法有多天真。我逐渐意识到让这些元素融会贯通才是重中之重，而在演员和工作人员之间有效沟通更不失为一门艺术。不得不说，这部电影承载的不仅仅是我一时的灵感，而是我人生的一个阶段。

作文4：

拓展写作

“Stereotyped beliefs have the power to become self-fulfilling prophesies for behavior.”

先入为主的成见影响你对他人行为方式的理解。

—Elizabeth Aries, Professor of Psychology, Amherst College. From her book “Men and Women in Interaction, Reconsidering the Differences”

摘自美国阿莫斯特学院心理学教授，伊莉莎白? 阿瑞斯的《反思男女在交往中的行为差异》

   In the brief quotation above, Professor Aries vividly describes a phenomenon I have often observed myself, but could never aptly put into an appropriate sentence. Indeed, I have witnessed too much of this process, not only in the trivialities of everyday life, but also on the grand scale of global interactions.

    上面短短的一句引述中，阿瑞斯教授生动形象地描述出了一种社会现象，这个现象我自己也经常注意到，但遗憾的是我一直找不到合适的措辞把它表述出来。事实上，小到日常琐事大到国际交往，我都看到了很多这样的例子。

Though never mistreated by peers myself, I have nevertheless witnessed considerable amounts of bullying at school. In most cases, a victim is the lonely, unpopular kind who became alienated from others in the first place due to some minor character flaws. However, even after the said person tries everything in his power to turn around, and even if he indeed managed to improve, he would continue to be everyone’s outlet for negative emotions. This has nothing to do with the person attempting to improve, and everything to do with the quotation from Professor Aries’ book. People have a tendency to follow their preconceptions: it doesn’t matter if the pathetic loser suddenly started to smile at people; he is still bound to get annoying sooner or later; any of his newly adopted virtues are easily overlooked, because he is trapped in a predictable routine of behavior set up by outside influences. And as simple as that, a human being becomes a prisoner of his own identity, helpless and hopeless.

    虽然我自己从没被伙伴们欺负过，但是我却目睹了很多校园暴力。大多数情况下，被欺负的一方都是寂寞孤单而且不受欢迎的，他们往往由于一些性格上细微的缺点而在一开始就被大家疏远。然而，即使他们竭尽全力去克服自身的缺点，甚至在他们已经做出改变后，大家依然欺负他们，用来发泄他们的负面情绪。这种情况的出现并不是那些努力想改变自己的孩子的错，而是与文章在一开始所引用的阿瑞斯教授书中的那句话中所提到的问题有关。人们倾向于坚持那些先入为主的判断：即使某个被欺负的可怜孩子突然间开始对他人微笑，在其他人看来，他迟早都要变回那个讨厌的家伙。同时这个孩子努力改正自身缺点的努力也被忽视了，这是因为由于外界的因素，人们已经对他行为的评价形成了一种思维定式。就这么简单，人成了自己思想的囚徒，无助而绝望。

Looking across a broader landscape, the same phenomenon is observed on the darker side of all international relations. As many a humanitarian worker can testify, stereotyping is one of the most deadly diseases within modern society. In an age when malevolent misinformation and historical rancor flourish over publications and internet, people can effortlessly form their opinion about other nations without actually meeting any one person from those areas. Consequently, the stereotypes they hold can never be proved fallacious, and the groundless prejudice created will then take its root deep inside, grow stronger with every piece of new “discovery”, and one day burst with considerable, even lethal hostility when an actual encounter is made between them and the subject of their animosity. How many Americans think of terrorism when they see an Arab? How many Chinese people recall the Nanking Rape when met with a Japanese? The more educated of our fellow countrymen may restrict irrational anger with reason and civility, but in this age of accelerated globalization, a few clear-minded individuals can never be enough.

    从宏观的层面来看，在国际关系较为阴暗的一面里，这种现象都有所体现。正如很多人道主义工作者所证实的，思维偏见是现代社会最致命的顽疾之一。如今这个时代，蓄意炮制的谣言和历史积怨充斥着出版界和网络，人们往往在还没有真正见过某个国家或地区的人时就对其形成主观的看法。因此，他们永远都不会发现他们的偏见是错误的，而这些毫无根据的偏见在他们的头脑中逐渐根深蒂固，并随着每一个在他们看来印证了他们看法的“事实”的出现而进一步加深。有朝一日，当这些人真正接触到那些他们怀有偏见的人时，这些固有的偏见能使双方产生相当的敌对情绪，甚至能造成致命的后果。想想看，在看到一个阿拉伯人后，有多少美国人会想起恐怖主义？在看到一个日本人后，有多少中国人会回想起南京大屠杀？诚然那些受过较高教育的国人或许能理智地控制住自己非理性的愤怒，然而在全球化进程不断加快的当下，仅仅有少数几个这样头脑理性冷静的人是远远不够的。

Is there a solution to this problem of personal and universal gravity? From what I have gathered during the last three years, either as a reasonably popular and trustworthy figure within the class, or as China’s delegate to many international conventions and programs, is that understanding remains the best way to remove any deep-held hatred or far-fetched stereotypes. Once the virus of false preconception is deleted from our systems, we can instantly see the true nature of any individual, people, or community. As we learn to reserve our opinions before gaining full knowledge of the facts, as we remove the veil of differing cultures, we make ourselves wiser by far than the blinded zealots craving for conflicts and revenge, and call into being another ounce of sympathetic maturity, that this world desperately needs.