奇迹暖暖小屋名字:侪入美国娱乐圈主流的华裔笑星 Joe Wong

这位长相有些滑稽的人叫 Joe Wong（黄西），现在正在美国娱乐圈走红，他一上场，随便一句话，一个表情，甚至一个停顿，也会引起阵阵掌声笑声。他算是进入美国喜剧界的主流了，甚至被请到白宫去讲笑话。另一位北京侃爷出身的北美崔哥（Brother Sway）虽然也用英文讲过喜剧小品，譬如去咖啡馆讲中国功夫或者星巴克的笑话。但是崔哥比起 Joe Wang 来，显得边缘化多了，主要还是在华人社区有些名气。Joe Wong 的演出有过非常宏大的场面，现场几千上万人，也曾出现在美国亿万观众的当红电视节目里，听众总是被逗得前仰后合。
Joe 显然潜心研究过西方喜剧的路子，他的一鸣惊人是个异数。Joe 的英语并不纯正，但他深谙西方文化的幽默要素和喜好。除了东方面孔给人以新鲜感外，他非常懂得怎样向主流靠拢，
譬如，美国人热衷谈性，有点类似于中国的成人笑话。Joe 第一次上全美电视夜间节目 Letterman Show 的一开始就讲了个带色的笑话迎合他们的趣味，说他读到一个研究报告表明，性成熟的巅峰是18岁。他说，可我到了25岁才得知这一点（他是24岁从中国来美的）。他故意顿了一下，一脸茫然的样子，说，在我蜜桃最成熟多汁的时候，怎么就无缘被人咬一口呢？
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"I read a report saying that a man reached their sexual peak at the age of 18, but I did not know this until I was 25. So the world would never know what a stud I was.    Nobody took a bite out of this peach when I was ripe."
这个笑话暗喻东方的保守文化使得很多人生理成熟以后很久还不懂“人事”，比较西方的性早熟性开放，对比很强烈。引得老外笑到捧腹。
他接着以移民生活为题材讲笑话，说是为了公民入籍考试，他必须学习美国历史，其中一个问题是：谁是本杰明-富兰克林？
"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
And the second one was:
"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
因为美钞百元大票上印有富兰克林的头像，他于是调侃说：富兰克林不就是我们商店被抢的诱因么？第二个问题：什么是宪法第二修正案？第二修正案保障的是公民持枪自卫的权利。他接着用完全一样的答案和语气调侃第二修正案，暗讽该案具有很强的副作用，使得美国枪支管制松散，暴力案件加剧。这类笑话没有深厚的文化背景是讲不出来的，很多涉及敏感话题。虽然美国是言论自由的大国，面对亿万观众，尤其是面对上层社会比如白宫的时候，其中的分寸拿捏也很重要。Joe 做得非常好。当然名气到了他这个层次，后面的高参估计也少不了。
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这是Joe在白宫的经典段子，值得反复咀嚼品味
Joe 最出色的段子，我以为就是上面这则在白宫讲美国政治的段子。为此他精心准备了很久，非常经典，相信会作为保留节目流传下去。美国副总统拜登笑得很开心，奥巴马因故没有出席，也被 Joe 调侃了一番，暗示奥巴马因为害怕被他开涮吓得不敢来了。精彩之处比比皆是，比如下面几段就让人拍案叫绝，这是怎样的天才！
他先是当面拿副总统拜登开涮。他说，我来前就看过了副总的自传，现在当面见到了他本人。他看了一眼拜登，然后转向观众说，我不得不说，书上的拜登比他本人好太多了。这是讽刺他写自传过分美化和宣传自己。这种无伤大雅的玩笑，贵为美国第二号人物，也只能报以掌声。
话题也说到移民后代为什么要学双语。其实第一代移民由于深厚的祖国情结，尽管自己生活在两种文化的夹缝中难以进入西方文化的主流，却也不愿意看到自己的孩子完全“香蕉”化，于是特别强调对中国语言的学习（也因此全美各地的周末中文学校越办越红火），怕孩子失去中华文化的根儿在西方社会迷失自己。Joe 却故意把双语学习的原因指向另一面，调侃美国。当儿子不喜欢学习繁琐的中文，问父亲为什么要他学中文？Joe 的回答是：孩子，将来你如果做美国总统，你当然需要用英文来签署法令，可你也要用中文与你最大的债主中国谈判不是？
奥巴马不在场，Joe 也不放过，一样开涮这位美国新总统。拿总统开玩笑是谐星到白宫表演的一个传统了。总统与演艺界明星一样，都是供大众娱乐的。Joe 的诺贝尔和平奖的玩笑我开始觉得有些过分，但似乎并没越线，满场的政客名流一样欢声笑语。他说大家都批评奥巴马太过软弱，但是奥巴马还在同时指挥着两场战争啊，他们居然还授予他诺贝尔“和平”奖！没有比这个更操蛋的事了吧。他停顿片刻，说，唯一可以想到的比这个更操蛋的事就是，如果你拿了诺贝尔和平奖，你却转赠给军方（满堂大笑）。
后来他又开总统和副总统的玩笑，讽刺他们人浮于事，没有效率。他说，如果我当总统，我要用降低生产率的方式彻底解决失业问题，这样，一个人的活就让两个人来做，这就好比我们的总统和副总统的工作一样。他也提到了奥巴马的黑白混血背景给了他这个新移民以希望，既然半白半黑 (half black half white) 都可以登上权力颠峰，自己是半不白半不黑（half not black half not white）的少数族裔新移民，也应该一样可以竞选总统。
最后Joe 开始 mock 自己的总统竞选纲领，讲的都是政治热门话题，一样嬉笑拉扯皆成幽默。首先讽刺竞选口号往往都是华而不实的空架子，他说自己的竞选口号是 Who cares （爱咋咋，谁管你？其双关在他此前交代过自己的昵称就是 Hu，Hu caress， 就是对选民保证他急大家所急）. 请看这个段子的上下文：
You may be saying "Hey, what would be your campaign slogan?" You see, I spent ten years in the past decade (laughter) [20] oh you too? okay. (laughter) So I understand that American people are suffering, so my campaign slogan would be "Who Cares". (laughter)
他先说的是同义重复的废话  I spent ten years in the past decade，然后故意面对观众的反应说，哦，原来你跟我一样啊，一个 decade 中花费了十年，来观察美国的社会问题，因而深知美国人民饱受经济不景气的煎熬。然后转到这个 Who/Hu cares 的双关语口号来：表面上是我才不在乎美国人民死活呢，实际是突出自己救民于水火的的亲民形象。
几乎所有竞选中的热门话题都成为他的笑料。他说，为了争取先锋派年轻人的选票，他保证当选以后，不仅要使同性恋合法化，而且成为合法婚姻的必需形式（即，要让异性婚姻非法化）。他讽刺美国高达50%的离婚率，也故意反着说：我现在是结婚了，可婚前我犹豫了很久，我想，哇，多么可怕，有50%的婚姻会一直持续到老，挣脱不了。他说他有解决地球暖化的方案，就是把华氏改成摄氏，原来100度高温，眨眼间就降到了40度了。
Joe 在表演过程中，非常注意细节。比如，他说成为公民以后，他立马把选票投给了奥巴马和拜登。然后转身看拜登，没等拜登反应，他抢先说了声不用谢（you are welcome）。这是给拜登一个措手不及，凸显拜登反应迟缓。因为西方的习惯是无论何时你受惠于人，你都要表达谢意。Joe 说投票选了拜登，理所当然要领受拜登的谢意，所以他故作脱口而出，说了一声不用谢。可是拜登还愣在那里呢。我们的副总统大人显得多么迟钝啊。
Joe 讲喜剧小品，不徐不疾，张弛有度。他对西方观众心理的把握很到位。他自我设计的形象是不露锋芒，故作木纳，甚至有点机器人似的一脸茫然，其幽默机智隐含其中。他的风格受到西方传统的影响，远胜于中国的相声和小品。他的笑话在国人中据说不很讨好。他自己在访谈中也说，他初出道在同胞人圈子里讲过，虽然精心准备了，会心而笑的却不多，这使得他开始很丧气，甚至怀疑自己是否是喜剧演员的材料。后来慧眼识才的还是老外。
他在美国成为华裔谐星而广为人知以后，他对记者说自己还不能算完全成功，一个成功的喜剧艺人不能仅仅局限于到俱乐部甚至电视上，表演几个零星的段子，至少要演几部电视情景喜剧（Sit-com）。他正在朝这个方向努力，最大的难关当然还是情景剧的剧本的创作。
Joe 是一个从我们这代留学生新移民中成长出来的值得关注和期待的喜剧艺术家。他的出现有助于改善我们东方人过于拘谨，被主流社会和文化边缘化的形象。
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为帮助读者/听众了解这几个段子，我在网络上搜到了热心粉丝的两个帖子，转载如下：
【附1】 Letterman Show transcript：
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
And the second one was:
"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
Thank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
from：
http://www.chenwangdesign.com/blog/2009/05/joe-wongs-letterman-show-script.html
【附2】
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某网友：
这几天我很迷黄西/Joe Wong 3月17号在RTCA Dinner (The Radio and Television Correspondents Association Dinner，全美电台电视记者协会年会晚宴）上的表演。这个晚餐会是当天在C-SPAN 和C-SPAN2 频道上现场直播的，但我直到几天后才在youtube上看到的。实在太迷了，而且网上好像也没见他的表演全文，我就决定把它的全文听写下来并集中注释一下。听写中有个别词不确定用"(??)" 标出来了。注释（理解他的包袱是什么意思）是靠的众多的youtube、mitbbs上的留言，以及自己查字典和google。
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Transcript for Joe Wong at RTCA Dinner, aired on C-SPAN 3/17/2010
Transcribed by PB
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Good evening, everyone. My name is Joe Wong, but to most people, I'm known as "who?!" (laughter) which is actually my mother's maiden name, (laughter) and the answer to my credit card security question. (laughter) [1]
But joking aside, I just want to reassure everybody that I am invited here tonight. (laughter) [2]
I grew up in China, who didn't? (laughter) [3] And my childhood memories are totally ruined by my childhood. (laughter) When I was in elementary school, as part of the curriculum, I had to work at a rice paddy right next to a xxxxx quarry where they use explosives to break rocks, and that is where I learned that light travels faster than sound. (laughter) which is almost as slow as a flying rock. (laughter) [4]
My dad was a grumpy guy, but occasionally he would try to cheer me up with jokes, but he doesn't do it right. When I was seven, one day he said to me, "hey son, why is tofu better than centralized socialist economy?" (laughter) so five minutes later I said "why?" (laughter) He said "because I said so!" (laughter) [5]
I came to the United States when I was 24, to study at Rice University in Texas. (some applaud cheers and some laughter) that wasn't a joke (laughter) until now. (laughter) And I was driving this used car with a lot of bumper stickers that's impossible to peel off. And one of them said "If you don't speak English, go home". And I didn't notice it for two years. (laughter)
Like many other immigrants, we want our son to become the president of this country and we try to make him bilingual, you know, Chinese at home and English in public, which is really tough to do, because many times I have to say to him in public "Hey listen, if you don't speak English, go home" (laughter) And he would say to me, "Hey dad, why do I have to learn two languages?" I said "son, once you become the president of the United States, you are going to have sign legislative bills in English, and talk to debt collectors in Chinese" (laughter) [6]
When I graduated from Rice, I decided to stay in the United States, because in China, I can't do the thing I do best here, being ethnic. (laughter) And in order for me to become a U.S. citizen, I have to take this American history lessons, where they ask us questions like "Who is Benjamin Franklin?", where I was like "ah, the reason our convenience store gets robbed?" (laughter) [7] "What's the Second Amendament?", where I was like "ah, the reason our convenience store gets robbed?" (laughter) [8] "What is roe vs. wade?", where I was like "ah, two ways of coming to the United States?" (laughter) [9]
Later on I read so much about the American history that I started to harbor white guilt. (laughter) [10] In the America they say that all men are created equal, but after birth, it kind of depends on the parents' income, or early education and health care. (laughter) I read in the Max House Men's Health Magazine that President Obama every week has two cardio days and four weight lifting days. You see, I don't have to exercise, because I have health insurance. (laughter) I live in Massachusetts now, where we have universal health care; then we elected Scott Brown (laughter) - talk about mixed messages. (laughter) [11] I think there was a movie about him - it's called "Kill Bill" (laughter) [12]
I'm honored to meet vice president Joe Biden here tonight, (Joe turned to face Biden) I actually read your autobiography, and today I see you. (Joe turned back to face audience) I think the book is much better. (laughter) They should've get guest cast Brad Pitt, or even Angelina Jolie. (laughter)
So to be honest, I was really honored to be here tonight, and I prepared for months for tonight's show, and I showed the white house my jokes about President Obama, and that is when he decided not to come. (laughter)[13] And he started to talk about immigration reforms, (laughter) Take that, Stephen Colbert (laughter) [14] And president Obama has always been accused of being too soft, but he was conducting two wars. and they still gave him the Nobel Peace Prize, and he accepted it. (laughter) You can't be more bad ass than that. (laughter) where actually, I'm thinking the only way you can be more bad ass than that is if you take the Nobel Prize money and give it to the military. (laughter)
We have many distinguished journalists here tonight, whom I consider as my peers. (laughter) because I used to write for campus newspaper. (laughter) I think journalism is the last refugee for puns. [15] Only on the newspaper can you say things like "I was born in the year of horse and that is why I'm a naysayer" (laughter) [16] my point exactly.
And tonight is my first time on C-SPAN, which is a channel I obviously always watch, when I couldn't stand the sensationalism and demagoguery of PBS? and QVC. (laughter) If I still couldn't fall asleep after watching C-SPAN, there's C-SPAN2 and C-SPAN3. (laughter) [17] Thank you very much. (laughter)
So I became a U.S. citizen in 2008, which I'm really happy about. (applause) thank you very much. American is number one, (laughter) that's true, 'cause we won the world series every year. (laughter) [18]
After becoming the U.S. citizen, I immediately registered to vote for Obama and Biden. (Joe turned to face Biden) you're welcome. (laughter) You handed me a had me at "Yes We Can" (laughter) (Joe turned back to audience) that was the their slogan. (laughter)
So after getting Obama and Biden elected, I felt this power trip. (laughter) And I start to think maybe I should run for president myself. Where, I have to take a step back and explain a little bit, you know, because I have always been a morose and pessimist guy. I felt that life is kind of like, pee into the snow in a dark winter night, you probably make a difference, but it's really hard to tell. (laughter) [19] But now, we have a president who's half black half white, it just gives me a lot of hope, because I'm half not black half not white. (laughter) Two negatives make a positive. (laughter)
You may be saying "Hey, what would be your campaign slogan?" You see, I spent ten years in the past decade (laughter) [20] oh you too? okay. (laughter) So I understand that American people are suffering, so my campaign slogan would be "Who Cares". (laughter) [21]
If elected, I would make same-sex marriage not only legal but required, (laughter) that will get me the youth vote.(laughter) You see I'm married now, but I used to be really scared about marriage, I was like "wow, 50% of all marriages end up lasting forever" (laughter)
And I will eliminate unemployment in this country, by reducing the productivity of the American workforce. (laughter) so two people will have to do the work of one, just like the President and the Vice President,(laughter) or the Olsen twins. (laughter) [22]
And despite heart disease and cancer, most Americans die of natural causes. So if elected, I will find a cure for natural causes. (laughter) You seem to like that one. (laughter) but you won't be covered by health insurance though, (laughter) because of pre-existing conditions. (laughter)
And I have a quick solution for global warming. I will switch from Fahrenheit to Celsius, (laughter) It was 100 degrees, now it's 40. (laughter) You're very welcome. (laughter)
And I'm great with foreign policy. Because I am from China, and I can see Russia from my backyard. (laughter) I believe that Unilateralism is too expensive, and open dialog is too slow. So if elected, I will go with text messaging. (laughter) I will text our allies just to say hi, (laughter) and text our enemies when they are driving. (laughter) "OMG you're building a nuclear weapon?" (laughter), "but you're doing it wrong LOL" (laughter)
I just want to thank Video TV correspondence xx xx for having me here tonight. This is the first time I wish my son knew what I was doing. Thank you so much and have a very good night. Thank you Linda Scott.
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注解: based on comments from youtube and mitbbs, dictionary look-up, and google
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[1] 他妈妈姓“Hu”，刚好跟"Who"同音。 maiden name ：大部分老美婚后改跟丈夫姓(所以夫妻俩同姓)；女性结婚前的姓就叫maiden name
[2] 黄西这儿强调说“我是被邀请的”，mitbbs上有人指出这是指去年年底两次白宫安全问题--11月份、12月份各有一对夫妇没有邀请函但通过了层层安检进到了白宫宴会并到奥巴马身边。
[3] youtube留言：he said he grew up in china... it's a joke about the over population of china and how? many people there are there。      还是youtube留言，但解释不同：If you related to "I grew? up in US, who wasn't?" You got to be smart to understand him。（Mitbbs上有人同意这一个，说这是讽刺美国redneck动不动就说I grew up in US。 ）
[4] 黄西说他小学时（劳动课）在水稻田（rice paddy）干活，旁边就有一个采石场，用炸药炸石头。因为经常看到爆炸光亮听到爆炸声（还可能有碎石飞过来），后面黄西接着说“我学到了光传播的速度比声音快，而声音传播的速度大概跟飞溅的石头差不多”。
[5] youtube留言：tofu and centralize economic joke: you got? understand that China is a Communist country, there is only one party in power, everything is like his dad said "because I said so"
还是youtube留言，稍微有点不同：it's sort of non-sense talk said by his dad, then his dad went 'because I? said so'.... his farther == the centralized social system. the nonsense == whatever enforced by the centralized social system.
[6] youtube留言：it is "debt collector"..Because of the huge current account deficit? US owes to China.
还是youtube留言，稍微有点不同：China is the country that holds the most US treasure bonds now.
[7] youtube留言：Benjamin Franklin - 100 dollar bills.   Convenience stores have 100 dollars bills. （100美元币上是美国总统本杰明-弗兰克林的头像；便利店/社区小超市当然有100刀币；所以被抢劫了）
[8] youtube留言：Second Amendment: is the freedom to carry gun. - It gives the robbers guns to rob convenience stores.? （因为民众能自由持枪，所以小店被抢劫了）
黄西这个笑话之前在别的地方也讲过。我google的一个中文网站的解释：什么是美国宪法第二修正案（允许公民拥有枪支）？黄西接着说：这是不是我们杂货店被抢的原因？
[9] youtube留言：Roe vs Wade, famous? court case on abortion. Joe thought two ways of coming to US, on boat or swim
我找的别的地方的：In 1973, the US Supreme Court had prohibited states from making laws that interfered with a woman's right to an abortion during the early months of pregnancy. Joe 把 roe vs. wade 转换成 row (rowing the boat) & wade (swimming ) to USA. (划船和游泳偷渡到美国)
[10] youtube留言：He studies America history. It talks a lot of white Americans kill Indians, slavery, kills, etc. Basically, white American were guilty of many things, i.e. white guilt. He starts to harbor (to feel inside)? white guilt (as if he were white).
[11] youtube留言：Obama does exercise, but Joe himself doesn't need to because he has health insurance. MA has universal health care which is viewed as the result of Democratic dominance in MA. But they recently voted a Republic senator Scott Brown, mixed message. （MA就是Massachusetts，常说的麻省）
[12] youtube留言：Scott Brown is a? Republican and their motto on health care reform seemed to be "Kill (the health care reform) Bill"
[13] 新浪北美网上报道说，这个年会历来是“上至总统下到各大媒体负责人都会出席”。本来奥巴马已应邀出席，但因为health insurance reform bill最后投票是3月21日，他“亲自四处催票拉票，频上媒体呼吁支持。临时排定当晚6点上保守倾向的Fox电视台的访谈，所以无法出席”；白宫于是请副总统Biden代为出席。“黄西说，当然有点失望，不过没问题，听说‘副总统人也挺幽默的’ ”。（我想这样他一定临时修改了讲稿，而他开的副总统的那个玩笑效果很好，考虑到他有限的修改时间，可见他的功底！）
[14] 黄西说“Stephen Colbert，把这个表演出来”。Stephen Colbert 是一个美国喜剧演员，因他的讽刺和扑克脸式的喜剧表演风格在美国广为人知。2006年4月29日，科拜尔受邀在白宫新闻记者协会晚餐会上进行表演。科拜尔用他一贯的风格当面挖苦了当时的美国总统小布什。（“历史”的相似性）
[15] pun: a humorous use of a word or phrase which has several meanings or which sounds like another word （以转意或谐音的方法达到诙谐的效果）
[16] youtube留言："Nay-SAYER". Horses go “Nay" . It was a joke on a bad pun.
neigh: a long, loud, high call that is produced by a horse when it is excited or frightened. （马嘶叫声）
[17] C-SPAN, C-SPAN2, C-SPAN3 是美国的有线电视频道（一家三个）新闻频道，创办于1979年，节目内容主要探讨政府及公共事务议题，也有转播国情咨文、共和党全民大会、民主党全民大会。所以黄西说用它来催眠。
[18] youtube留言：Because the World? Series is not for the world...only 2 countries play in the World Series. America and Canada. （World Series 指棒球比赛，说是国际/World，其实就美国和加拿大两国的球队。大部分时候都是美国赢）
[19] youtube留言：actually it means pee in snow will melt it, as pee is warmer. but since? it is a dark winter night, so it is hard to tell
[20] "I spent ten years in the past decade" -- ten years 是十年，decade也表示十年。
[21]我的理解 “Who cares” 有两层意思：1。"Who"指黄西自己（表演开始的时候黄西说大部分老美不知道他，指代他为"Who"），这个竞选口号是“我关心你们”；2。“Who cares”直接的意思是“谁在乎呢？！” 因这双重意思而逗笑。
[22] “Olsen twins” 好莱坞最红双胞胎姐妹花奥尔森姐妹。看你认不认得出这张她们小时候的图片及她们演的那部电视剧（我很喜欢那部电视剧）
【相关信息：美国深夜节目收视率冠军的「大卫赖特曼秀」，上月（Apr. 2009）17日晚上破天荒邀请中国口音极重的黄西（Joe Wong）亮相，以英语讲美式笑话，近六分钟的演出，观众反应热烈。...