浮沉比喻人是什么意思:性满足和女性性高潮的秘密

女性达到性高潮的难度比你认为的还要一般。你是怎样达到性满足的呢？<><>

Are women having orgasms in bed? Men seem to think so. According to the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior, conducted by the Center for Sexual Health Promotion, 85 percent of men believe their partner climaxed during their most recent love-making session.

女性在床上能达到性高潮吗？男性好像都这么认为。据性健康促进中心进行的性健康和性行为的全国性调查，85%的男性相信他们的伴侣在大多数的性爱交流中达到了性高潮。<><>

If that's the case, women everywhere deserve a shot at an Oscars for their in-bed acting abilities. Because, according to the very same NSSHB study cited above, only 64 percent of women reported reaching orgasm during their most recent sexual event—which means that the other 21 percent are most likely faking it. (Some men might have been with other men during their most recent sexual encounter, but according to the researchers the discrepancy is too large for that to be the only reason.)

如果事实如此，任何地方的女性因为她们在床上的表演能力而完全有可能获得奥斯卡奖的提名。因为据上文提及的同一研究报告，只有64%的女人称在大多数性爱中达到了高潮，这就意味着剩余的21%很可能是假装达到高潮的。（有些男性在最近的做爱期间或许经常和别的男性在一起，但是据研究人员所说，伴侣之间关于这种事情的矛盾将会更大，成为唯一的原因。）<><>

What's more, an online survey over at SkinnyScoop.com reveals that a whopping 80 percent of women would prefer a massage to sex with their partner.

更重要的是，独家小道消息网上的一份在线调查揭示称多达80%的女性更倾向伴侣抚摸自己，而不是与自己性交。<><>

This doesn't seem all that shocking to me. On most days, I'd prefer a box of Cheez-its to another round of unsatisfying sex.

这看起来并不让我大吃一惊。在很多日子里，我更喜欢一盒奶酪而不是又一次不满意的性爱。<><>

Why? In the 11 years since I first became sexually active, I have never experienced an orgasm during intercourse.

为什么？自我第一次有性冲动后的11年里，我从未在性交中体验到高潮。<><>

Not to say that I've never experienced an orgasm. One ex-boyfriend had magical fingers. One particularly bumpy bus ride brought me to a surprise climax. And my clitoris is having an intense love affair with my vibrator.

这并不是说我从未有过快感。一位前男友有着不可思议的手指。一次特别的颠簸的乘坐公交也带给我意外的高潮。而且我的阴蒂有着一种想和振动器发生风流韵事的强烈欲望。

But an orgasm from intercourse alone? It's never happened. Bringing Sexy Back: 5 Ways To Increase Female Libido In Marriage

仅从性交中获得一次高潮吗？从来没有。找回性感觉：5种方法让婚姻中的女性性欲更强。<><>

And a sexual history like mine isn't as rare as you'd think.

一段性爱历史可能与我的相似，但不会是你所认为的那样罕见。<><>

In Secrets from the Sex Lab, Judy Dutton wrote that two-thirds of women don't typically orgasm during intercourse. This would be disquieting on its own, but even more depressing, 15 to 20 percent of cases seen by sex therapists involve women who have never had any orgasm at all, either alone or with a partner. How can this be?

在《来自性试验室的秘密》中，朱迪杜登写道三分之二的女性在性交中通常没有达到高潮。就这一描述本身而言，将会令人很忧虑，甚至让人更沮丧。性医疗师所遇的15%到20%的案例中包括一些从未达到高潮的女性，无论她们是在自慰或与伴侣做爱时。怎么会这样？<><>

One major problem is our pesky anatomy. In 1966, Masters and Johnson studied the logistics of female orgasm and found that women are most likely to reach climax through stimulation of the clitoris. That's great to know, but the truth of the matter is the clitoris is too darn far away from the vaginal opening to reap the benefits of your average in-and-out sex.

一个主要问题是麻烦的生理构造。1996年，马斯特斯和约翰逊研究过女性性高潮的运行体系，并发现通过刺激阴蒂很可能让女性达到高潮。了解到这一现象实在是太好了。但是，事实真相是阴蒂离阴道口太远以至于不能有效地接收抽插性交带来的快感。<><>

And when it comes to sex, men can oftentimes be in a hurry to get to the in-and-out.

一谈到性交，男性经常匆匆忙忙地进入抽插阶段。<><>

Not only that, but pain during sex is also quite common.

不但如此，性交疼痛也是再正常不过的。<><>

In fact, 30 percent of adult women experienced pain the last time they had sex, compared to only 5 percent of men—and sexual pain doesn't exactly make one eager for more sex, nor does it allow one to relax enough to experience pleasure.

事实上，与仅占5%的男性相比，30%的成年女性在她们最后一次性爱中感觉到了疼痛。而且性交疼痛既不让人渴望更多的性行为，也不允许人在充分休息后再享受快乐。<><>

Women who have never had an orgasm may be suffering from anorgasmia, also known as female orgasm disorder. Anorgasmia may be psychologically induced, but could also be caused by other medical problems, such as multiple sclerosis, pelvic trauma, spinal cord injury, vulvodynia, or even a hormonal imbalance.

从未有过性高潮的女性可能患上性冷淡，也称女性性高潮失调。性冷淡也许是心理因素诱发的，也有可能是别的医疗问题所导致的，如多发性硬化症、骨盆创伤、脊椎损伤、外阴疼痛、甚至激素失调。

In addition to the above culprits, there are a plethora of things that affect women's libido and arousal levels and can lead to the inability to orgasm. Among these are stress, exhaustion, SSRIs (a common type of anti-depressant medication), and a pain-in-the-butt partner. (Seriously. That comment you just made about my thunder thighs does not make me want to sleep with you.) 5 Reasons Having Sex Is Better Than Being Skinny

除了上述罪魁祸首外，还有一些过剩的物质影响女性的性欲和觉醒水平，也能导致没有性高潮。这些因素包含有压力、精力、抑制剂（抗抑郁剂药物的一种普通类型）和屁股疼痛的伴侣。（玩笑话，你对我那粗大腿的评论让我不想和你睡一起。）性爱理智好于性爱一无所知。

Fortunately, there are some easy solutions.

幸运的是，有着许多简单的解决办法。<><>

If anatomy is your issue, you could follow sex counselor Ian Kerner's advice, and always follow the "intercourse plus" rule. What this means is that you should indulge in some intercourse, plus some clitoral stimulation. Or some intercourse, plus some anal play. Why? In a 20,000-participant study conducted by Juliet Richters at the University of New South Wales, only 50 percent of women were able to orgasm with intercourse alone. But the addition of extra activities—activities that stimulated their clitoris or other erogenous zones—increased their odds of achieving orgasm by 90 percent.

如果你的问题出在生理部位，你可以听从性咨询师伊恩肯纳的建议，并经常遵循“性交附加物”规则。意思是你应该陶醉于一些附加刺激阴蒂动作的性爱中，或者一些带有肛交的性爱。为什么？朱丽叶里克特对新南威尔士大学的2万参与者进行了调查，结果表明仅有50%的女性在自慰的时候能达到性高潮。但是增加其他的动作，如刺激她们的阴蒂或者别的性敏感区，也可以增加90%达到性高潮的几率。<><>

Is pain the issue for you? Try experimenting with different sexual positions or, if you're having problems with dryness, pile on the lube. If you're experiencing chronic pain you might want to check in with your doctor.

你有性交疼痛问题吗？尝试体验不同的性交体位，或者如果你的阴道很干燥，那就加点润滑油吧。如果你感学到长时间疼痛，你有必要让你的医生检查一下。<><>

Other things that could help?

别的行为有帮助吗？<><>

You could do kegel exercises regularly in order to strengthen the muscles that typically contract during orgasm. You could bring toys into the bedroom—even during sex—in order to add new sources of stimulation. You could stop thinking about that by-god orgasm, and instead concentrate on the other forms of pleasure you're feeling—after all, sex can be amazing without an orgasm. You could try a sexual arousal oil like Zestra, who is sponsoring this post.

你可以定期做凯格尔运动（又称骨盆体操），这样能够强化在高潮期间显著收缩的肌肉。你可以把性玩具带进卧室，在性爱的时候能增加新的性刺激。你可以不去考虑那天知晓的性高潮，相反你可以集中注意力于你体验到的其他形式的快乐。归根到底，没有高潮的性爱可以是令人感到非常惊奇的。你可以尝试一种性唤起润滑油，如推荐这篇文章的适趣液。<><>

More than anything else, though, you should identify what you like and what makes you feel good. You should talk to your partner about what makes your toes curl. You should communicate with each other so that you're having mutually rewarding sexual experiences.

尤其，你应该确定你喜欢的和让人感觉不错的。你应该告诉你的伴侣什么能让你感受到激情。你应该与别人沟通，这样会获得相互认为有价值的性经验。<><>

You should breathe. And enjoy the moment. In the end, whether or not you reach orgasm is almost beside the point.

你应该深呼吸，享受这一时刻。最后，无论你是否达到高潮已经几乎无关紧要了。

"Sexual Satisfaction And The Myth Of The Female Orgasm" is sponsored by Zestra.

“性满足和女性性高潮的秘密”这篇文章由适趣液推荐。